Monday, March 15, 2010

Veils off

Alright people, it's really late.
Not the blog, that's due today.
The time.
It's one am.

I'm still up and wired, and it's not because I like to stay up late. It's because I told you I would write a blog every fortnight, and so that's what I will do. It's a small matter of integrity, of credibility. I promised and I'm committed. At least, I'm about to be, in more ways than one.

In exactly four weeks and four days I will be walking down the aisle to meet my chosen life partner at the metaphorical bridge to our future. The fact that there is not actually an 'aisle' where the ceremony is being held is really not the point. The point is, it's a profound life moment. Whether it's a turning point or just a point in time, depends on who you talk to. Where will this metaphorical bridge lead us, once we cross over to the other side?

Truthfully, I doubt it will be anywhere that different than where we were already headed; before the aisle, the dress and the cake. I say this not to be cynical, but because I see my impending nuptials as a simple extension of the relationship we have, as it currently exists. Before saying "I do", I still would have. So, why 'take the plunge' at all? Well, why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side, of course. We all know that.

The chicken sets a fine example. You don't find out what's across the road unless you pop over and see for yourself. The chicken too, was quaking and clucking, praying it wouldn't get hit by a car and that there wouldn't be a Red Rooster on the corner. It held out hope that once across the road, it would find a nice hen house and finally lay that golden egg.

I don't expect my relationship or my life to magically transform after marriage. Perhaps to solidify. Sort of like baking a nice cake. When all of the ingredients are combined, they taste good enough to lick the spoon. But baked, the flavour is somehow more rounded, the texture is more...something.

Relationships change because people change. We evolve. Maybe for some, it's getting married that causes change. For some people, it's time. Circumstance. Other people. Careers and miscalculations. Anything can happen. People come and they go. They make new choices and they take opportunities. Sometimes they walk away. The triumph is inherent in the risk. All you need to know is what your gut tells you. Then, trust it.

You won't see me hiding behind a veil on my wedding day. I have nothing to hide and any fear I have of the future has nothing to do with who waits for me at the altar. If anything, by acknowledging my partner and celebrating our relationship, I expect to strike a sense of balance, to feel more grounded than before. What is across that bridge will no longer seem important. There is someone to push me forward and to pull me back. I am more equipped to cross it.

If you can find a person to stand still with, for however many moments, I highly recommend it.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

When you lay that golden egg, it will hatch with the most beautiful curly ranga hair.

cmb said...

Rejoice in standing still Peta. No rush, the rest will follow as it should.

Unknown said...

You don't need to justify what, why , nor how you decide to do anything but yourself. It is within yourself that you will find that balance and of course your partner to help you stand there with you. ili

twisted Italian cooking said...

Very inspiring of view on the mysteries of marriage, well done Peta.
Claude